Paul explained OUGHT Marriage like this in Ephesians 5:
“…so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” (verse 24)
“Husbands, love your wives…that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that he might present it to himself…not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth it and cherisheth it…” (verses 25-29)
Requirement of the wife: be to her husband in everything.
Requirement of the husband: sanctify and cleanse his wife with the word in a nourishing and cherishing manner.
Isn’t that the definition of FELLOWSHIP?
Notice Paul didn’t have to tell the wife to focus on Fellowship and talk to the husband. Why? Because the wife wants to do this already! It’s the men who have to be reminded to talk to their wives and focus on them in a nourishing and cherishing manner.
Notice Paul is saying the key to a paradisiacal marriage is the husband teaching his wife the Word of God. This makes several passages and customs logical.
Paul didn’t suffer a woman to speak in church and told them to ask their husbands when they get home (I Corinthians 14:34-35). Why? So they could have a paradisiacal marriage.
The Jewish nation had every boy memorize the scriptures and prevented the girls from learning them. Why? So they could have a paradisiacal marriage where the husband was able to teach the Word to the wife.
How many men can teach their wife about the Word of God?
How many men do teach their wife about the Word of God?
A paradisiacal marriage would be one in which the thing you MOST wanted to do is get to know your spouse better. A less than paradisiacal marriage is one in which getting to know your spouse better is NOT the thing you MOST want to do. (Sex is NOT giving a value or getting to know your spouse better...it is an EFFECT of getting to know your spouse better. It is a fine line, but the proof is in the cuddling afterwards...THAT is sustainable ;-)
We can now look at The OUGHT Marriage Model in the next post.